A Multisensory Exploration of Grief

In August 2024, I found out that we had unexpectedly lost my grandfather, Hans-Peter Ehrich. This news completely shocked the whole family as his brain was sharper than all of ours, even at the age of 82. But because my grandfather was stubborn in every way – which of course increased with age – in the last two decades of his life we were unsure about his health. He never went to the doctor for anything, in fact he usually refused.

As you may know, it is not easy to cope with grief. I decided to approach this challenging work through my senses, and since it may be of some help to others in a similar situation, I decided to share my process. Below is a brief recollection of my experience.

My multisensory discovery started by listing things that reminded me of my grandfather. Surprise, surprise, all of these things had something to do with the senses! And what I found really interesting, is that when listing these things, I found some things were constant variables in my grandfather’s life while other things came and went over time. This implies how dynamic our own multisensory identity is and how it changes over time. Whether it is our signature perfume, shower gel or our favorite food, these sensory aspects often can change depending on our taste and age.

What’s more, is our multisensory identity may be perceived differently by the different people in our lives. Our partner, mother, sibling, or best friend may all associate and remember us for different parts of our multisensory identity. That said, once I had a list, I went to my mom to collect her thoughts. My mom had a lot to contribute which led to some minor research.

Once I had a rough list, I categorized the list into time and location, coming to some patterns in his multisensory identity. Please note that this post was written over a period of 5 months, reflecting my slow collection and processing of my grandfather’s passing.

• Apples – My grandfather and his brother were caught stealing apples from the British Embassy in Hamburg, Germany when they were young.
• Cigarettes – He was a chain smoker since at least 13 years old!
• Marzipan – He was always obsessed with Marzipan, and I believe it comes from his first Christmases which were spent in Germany.
• German Language – My grandfather loved the sound of the German language which was actually his mother tongue. In 1952, his family immigrated from Germany to the US. I recently found out that in high school he was part of the German Club and took German language courses… probably for the easy A!

• Motor Oil – My grandfather was a mechanic much of his youth.
• Led Zeppelin’s Album Houses of the Holy (1973) and Bob Dylan’s Album Blood on the Tracks (1975) – The albums that remind my mom of my grandfather.
• Old Spice Original Shulton – According to my mom, my grandfather was an Old Spice man!
• Pipe Tobacco – This is absolutely how I remember my grandfather. My mom helped me uncover exactly which type of tobacco he used which was a Black Cavendish tobacco called Wilshire from the Tinder Box (originally located in Santa Monica, CA).
• Pink’s Hotdogs in Los Angeles – When he visited my mom and I in Los Angeles 10 years ago, he told us many stories about his days cab driving in LA. Apparently long driving days often included a late-night stop for a hot dog at Pink’s…
• Apples and Cheese – Apples are a constant for my grandfather and at some point, apples were combined with a really sharp, orange cheddar cheese. When my uncle and I were children visiting my grandfather in Big Bear, he would make us a huge bowl of sliced granny smith apples with big slices of cheddar cheese on top. It was for us to eat while playing Nintendo 64 or the like (soooo nostalgic!). Still one of my favorite food combinations.
• The Smell of Bacon – When my grandfather lived in Big Bear, we would go visit him for longer periods of time. Although I was born and raised a vegetarian, like it is for many, the smell of bacon is filled with fond memories. For me it is of my grandfather cooking a big breakfast (sadly not for me) in the kitchen.
• The Feeling of These ‘to-go’ Drink Bottles – He always supplied my uncle and I with these when we were kids, often filled with Ocean Spray Ruby Red Grapefruit juice.
• Big, Deep Laugh – My grandfather had a really big laugh. At some point our parrots were even able to mimic it.

• Still, Pipe Tobacco – BUT at some point, he started mixing his good quality pipe tobacco with a cheaper one to cut costs. Unfortunately, this changed the smell experience quite a bit.
• Fritos Scoops – Always on offer when you paid him a visit.
• Bread and French Toast – About 10 years ago my grandpa started making his own bread (with lots of cinnamon) and when we would visit, he would make that bread into delicious French toast!
• In-N-Out Burger – For his 80th birthday, we asked him what he wanted as a gift, and he said 2 burgers from In-N-Out Burger and some fries.
• Strawberry Rhubarb Crumble – His 80th birthday cake which he told me was (excuse my language) “an orgasm.”
• Milano Cookies, Peanut Butter and Nutella – Turned out that if the apocalypse would hit, my grandpa would have a huge supply of Milano cookies, peanut butter, and Nutella to get him through. We did not realize this obsession until we went to clean his home after he died. Although I did catch him at his computer eating Nutella straight from the jar with a spoon a few times…

This exercise turned out to be deeply meaningful for me. It gave me the space to revisit fond memories of my grandfather through the sensory experiences that mattered to him. What I found particularly fun is how much the above sensations mean to me just because they were an important part of my grandfather’s life. It was a very nice way for me to remember him by revisiting these things. While I know this approach may not resonate with everyone—we all process grief differently—it was profoundly helpful for me.

One part of this experience involved purchasing the pipe tobacco my grandfather used when I was a child, simply to smell it again. While researching it, I learned that Black Cavendish tobacco is produced through high heat or steam treatment followed by intense pressure, which gives it its distinctive sweetness, moist texture, and rich aroma. Reviews of Wilshire by Tinder Box often describe it as nutty, vanillic, and caramel-like—exactly as I remember. Many even note that the scent is pleasant enough that others don’t mind it being smoked indoors. My memories of my grandfather do agree…

Thank you for joining me on this personal journey. I hope it offered something meaningful—whether a deeper understanding of your own sensory identity or insight into the sensory world of someone you love.

This post is in loving memory of my grandfather, Hans-Peter Ehrich, June 19th, 1942 – August 2nd, 2024. If you are curious to read more about my grandfather’s life, you can read the obituary I wrote here.

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